An Orgasm a Day Keeps the Doctor Away

Some thoughts about one of those great joys of life that are absolutely free (like complaining) ... masturbation.

It seems that the historical disdain and prohibition against masturbation comes from its "wastefulness" ... the idea that it is a sin to waste your seed. Women, do you see: we have nothing to fear! This taboo has nothing to do with us.

And recently, in the city of Sheffield, England, the National Health Service produced a sex ed pamphlet for teens called “Pleasure” -- beautifully named IMHO. The pamphlet “encourages educators to tell teens about the positive physical and emotional effects of sex and masturbation, which is described as an easy way for people to explore their bodies and feel good."

The magic rub ... that's what I lovingly call it ... yes, I agree wholeheartedly. I think it’s a disgrace that we don’t encourage people of all ages to “get to know themselves” -- take away the historical bullshit and what really is the problem with masturbation? And think of the problems it could solve. I really believe that there might be less unwanted pregnancies -- and this includes pregnancies of married women too -- if people masturbated. Less sexual diseases passed on from one person to another. Oh, true, this won’t happen if we just give lip service (hee hee) to “an orgasm a day keeps the doctor a way.” No, it has to be the full thrust of commitment.

Less depression ...

More respect for your body ...

Less dangerous encounters with strangers ... [of course, some people do get off on that]

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Lastly, Dr. Joycelyn Elders was so unjustly harassed -- she is actually one of my heroes. And what she said about masturbation at that UN conference in 1994 seems so tame:
"I think that it is part of human sexuality, and perhaps it should be taught."

Cyndi Lauper ... gotta love that grrrrrl ... got it right in "She Bop" ...

... Hey I've been thinking of a new sensation
I'm picking up--good vibration--
Oop--she bop--

Do I wanna go out with a lion's roar
Huh, yea, I wanna go south n get me some more ...

She bop--he bop--a--we bop
I bop--you bop--a--they bop
Be bop--be bop--a--lu--she bop ...

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AN ORGASM A DAY KEEPS THE DOCTOR AWAY